Chemistry chemistry chemistry. In the last few weeks I've had three people tell me that chemistry is the key to a successful relationship.
I beg to differ. It matters for sure and it's certainly important. But ideally chemistry won't make your relationship a success - and it also isn't absolutely necessary for success. After studying love for way too long now, it seems those who are intensely in love from the outset are only slightly more likely to have a good relationship. For example in India where arranged marriages are the norm and they’ll tell you it’s possible to grow to love someone. Almost any two people who feel at least some attraction for each other and who don't have too many deal breakers can work together to build psychological, romantic and physical intimacy that will get stronger over time. Leaning back to what I've shared in my previous blog posts, in that in the end, love is ultimately a choice.
Chemistry matters but success really blooms with the ones that can learn to communicate and are in reasonable mental health. Happiness is important at the beginning of relationships, but communication is key to keeping your happiness over time. Its boredom, not lack of chemistry, that I think is the ultimate relationship killer. To keep things exciting, keep doing new, fun and unexpected things together. Prioritize him. Her. Ask questions ad show interest. Re-imagine your sex life. Schedule - dress up, and go out for date nights...or surprise them with something. Whatever you choose, I promise you the effort will do wonders for you both. If it doesn't, that may be a door that is closed for reason and not meant for you. Another one is meant for you. There is a door open somewhere, for everyone, and someone perfect is meant just for you. You just have to trust yourself in order to know which door is right for you. 💫
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